The Illusion of Reality

"Everything is an illusion - seek the truth within."
~Anonymous

Someone said it. They nailed it on the head. This wasn't one one of the usual 'how to' and 'what to' instruction manuals that have become fairly common reads now. The 'Ultimate' truth, the 'Absolute' reality, the 'Infinite' wisdom, the 'Perpetual' serenity, the 'Endless' mercy, and so on, and so forth. After the initial euphoria of the discovery of a new term at the 'whys' of the humdrum everydayness of things, certain words seem to lose their solid presence over time.

Wandering through life without an instruction manual is a difficult way to live. The hollowness of things strikes quite early and rituals lose their meaning one by one, so much so that a lot of habits one took for granted at a point in time appear ridiculous. Like old clothes that neither fit well nor make one feel good in, some attitudes also need to go. The experiments start way before one is even aware of them. Like the silent trial and error that is performed while making an honest attempt to evaluate what clothes look good on one's now undefinable shape, a parallel exercise unfolds in the deep recesses of the mind (cliched, yes, but for the lack of a better common mental imagery).

Existential questions have emerged in the mind since very long, perhaps for as long back as one can remember. The tipping point may be different. A death, a change, a separation or an undefinable lingering discomfort can set off a chain of thoughts that lead to facing the same query. Who am i, what is this world about, where do i go from here, is this existence for real, what is real, and most importantly, is there a meaning behind all this, is there a bigger picture beyond what we know of this life?

Roaming through the corridors of the existential edifice, one realises that there are many route-maps, each as convincing as the other. The old paradigms give way to the new and more and more guides come to the fore. Which gives an a la carte tray of options to choose from. Except, the availability of so many choices tends to confuse.

So we are back to where we began. The words supposed to convey lofty meanings are impressive in the beginning. The juxtaposition of elaborate terms conveying new perspectives is a fulfilling experience and the discussions where everyone has a unique perspective are satisfying for a while. Then, slowly, and unlike serendipity which sometimes collides into us with a flourish, the unfolding of the understanding that one is lost fills up the recesses of the mind.